This post is probably going to sound a little whiny and for that I have to say upfront that I'm sorry. I don't usually whine, but sometimes, well I do. And like I've mentioned before one of the many reasons I started this blog was to have a place to vent or whine or have my own private pity party :-).
For those of you that don't know, I have some pretty serious back issues for someone as young as me. I have been in severe pain for years and have done more rounds of physical therapy than I can count + massages + meds + the pain management injections + acupuncture + chiropractor and there's probably more that I just can't remember over the years. Finally this past fall I had surgery. That was really tough and the recovery was hard!!! But about 2 months ago I started feeling good - it was amazing. I still had pain of course, you don't "cure" back problems, but it was such a dramatic difference I was like a new person. I have had some flair ups though, which they told me to expect, but the flair ups have increased since I started boot camp. I have also had some weird bruising on my back that is new. So I called the back doc and had new tests run and the diagnosis is I still have degenerative disc disease, I have lesions and atherosclerosis, I still have herniated discs and I have chronic pain. I will have this forever. The good news is the surgery is still "holding". I just have to take it easier than the average person. What this means for right now is 2 pain shots today, new meds and a new round of physical therapy.
While I can deal with that without a pity party. The reason for tonight's pity party is the impact my danged back has on boot camp. I am seriously over-weight and out of shape. I want to live to play with my grandchildren and I don't want serious health problems. I want to chase my son and catch him. I want to help my son practice sports as he gets older. I want to look good. This is why I started boot camp 7 weeks ago. So far I have felt mentally and physically better than I ever have (with the exception of the back flare-ups).
So today my doc (who is a fitness freak and who's daughter teaches boot camp in Auburn) was upset with me, actually had a conniption fit. The reason for this is my 6-day boot camp schedule and the intensity of those workouts. He said someone 6-months out of back surgery and with my back condition just cannot do that. He said maybe 3 days a week, working up to 4. I talked him into letting me do 4 days since I just did a 3-day, 6-week session. However, the stipulation is I have to take it back or lower the intensity quite a bit if I have a flair up.
You are probably thinking ok - what's the catch? Why is this bad news? Why the pity party? Well dang-it. I have tried many diets and exercise programs over the years and nothing has worked. I haven't had the will-power to keep up. Well this time I have. I'm happy, I love it. I'm making progress. I'm getting somewhere. I want to keep it going. I want to step it up. I'm getting stronger. I'm increasing my stamina. For all these reasons I worked out a new regime with my trainer to be with her 6 times a week. Resting on Sunday. Now I can't do that. I know that 4 days a week is still great. I still need to be proud. I'll still get stronger. I'll still make progress. It just may not be as fast. And yes that will be ok.
But tonight it just makes me sad and mad!!! Hence the pity party. But tomorrow is a new day and a new attitude.
It will all be great, just a different great than I was looking forward to.
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